I have three broken fingers, but the pain is nothing compared to the heavy feeling in my heart. I live in a community where fewer than 5 percent of the population is most vocal, and closed minded. Today I sat through three hours of a hearing at the Zoning and Planning Commission of Lakeway. Recovery Ways was seeking a special Use Permit at the Lakeway Regional Medical Center. I have spent the past two months attempting to correct the massive amount of misinformation being constantly poured out by a combination of those who are simply uneducated about what an accredited treatment center does and those who are clearly saying NOT IN MY BACK YARD. If they won't permit Recovery Ways In a medical center, it sends a clear message that this community has no intention of allowing a medical rehabilitation facility to operate within its borders. The rhetoric and ludicrous comments made today pain me. I know that God is bigger still, but I don't like being in a community where the law doesn't seem to have a place in the process. Recovery Ways had a Permit By Right taken from them with no due process, and when they voluntarily moved to a medical center, that wasn't good enough. Daily, individuals in our community are denied treatment for addiction because there are not enough beds to serve the need. Residential treatment for professional adults is needed...it is part of love thy neighbor. There was no risk associated with this facility with such high standards of operation, and if anyone had taken the time to see that since their operations began in 2010, there has been NO trouble in that community, rather there have been improvements associated with recovery.
The silent majority needs to find their collective voice.
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Thursday, March 1, 2012
From the sideline to the firing line
Well, being charitable sometimes has tangible benefits. Remember my new friends from Utah who got tarred and feathered by my fellow citizens a couple weeks back? They hired me to consult for them as they continue their efforts to locate an addiction treatment facility in our fair city. And they have already sent the first check. I would have helped for free...but I am happy to have the income. I have met with the City Manager, the Mayor, and have begun to schedule meetings with the rest of the council...
I fly to Salt Lake City first thing tomorrow to see their organization and meet more of their people.
But as exciting as that is, it is not why I am writing. February was a brutal path of twists and turns, and here I thought 2012 would be a cake walk following 2011...but already I see it is purposeful that I would have the temporary jarring. Mental anguish will cause me to take long walks. Something I had been unable to do the latter part of 2011 as I slowly healed. But now I am out, mostly alone, and I have noticed the many older preople who live in my community. Their faces etched with the decades of twists and turns. Mostly alone...occasionally an older couple holding hands, but by far, most are alone.
In years past, I hardly gave notice to this part of the population as I passed them at Mach II with my hair on fire. But now, they don't look as old to me as they once did. And they don't look as curmudgeonly, rather they appear lonely more often than not. Spouses who have passed before them, children who have moved away or just moved on...and they are alone...so I stop and say hello...and pat myself on the back for that small offering. Yeah, I said it. I was proud of myself for offering a mere hello. Even now I can hardly stand to admit that to my laptop, much less to the one or two of you who may read this.
But there is more. In facing my own mortality, I realize each day we experience is an experience someone else may need to share. So, I am turning my ear to my newly discovered population of experience. Ok, some of them really are curmudgeons...we don't chat too long. Others are tea dates waiting to happen. I am wanting to know these founts of wisdom. I am signing up for a community service group that will occasionally drive individuals to doctor appointments, change light bulbs, sweep the patio...and in doing so will become richer still. I will be sure and share the experiences with you...there is someone out there reading this isn't there?
I fly to Salt Lake City first thing tomorrow to see their organization and meet more of their people.
But as exciting as that is, it is not why I am writing. February was a brutal path of twists and turns, and here I thought 2012 would be a cake walk following 2011...but already I see it is purposeful that I would have the temporary jarring. Mental anguish will cause me to take long walks. Something I had been unable to do the latter part of 2011 as I slowly healed. But now I am out, mostly alone, and I have noticed the many older preople who live in my community. Their faces etched with the decades of twists and turns. Mostly alone...occasionally an older couple holding hands, but by far, most are alone.
In years past, I hardly gave notice to this part of the population as I passed them at Mach II with my hair on fire. But now, they don't look as old to me as they once did. And they don't look as curmudgeonly, rather they appear lonely more often than not. Spouses who have passed before them, children who have moved away or just moved on...and they are alone...so I stop and say hello...and pat myself on the back for that small offering. Yeah, I said it. I was proud of myself for offering a mere hello. Even now I can hardly stand to admit that to my laptop, much less to the one or two of you who may read this.
But there is more. In facing my own mortality, I realize each day we experience is an experience someone else may need to share. So, I am turning my ear to my newly discovered population of experience. Ok, some of them really are curmudgeons...we don't chat too long. Others are tea dates waiting to happen. I am wanting to know these founts of wisdom. I am signing up for a community service group that will occasionally drive individuals to doctor appointments, change light bulbs, sweep the patio...and in doing so will become richer still. I will be sure and share the experiences with you...there is someone out there reading this isn't there?
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Standing For What Matters
Sometimes sitting on the sideline can't be an option, even when you are amed only with reason and your challenger carries a bomb. Tonight I sat through a community meeting because a company is bringing a recovery/ treatment center to our quiet community...ok, I say quiet, but I think I might be more accurate to say my raging community.
The individuals who came here from Utah on a moments notice to provide accurate information about what they do and don't do were met with heckling, shouting, called liars, and treated in a most uncharitable manner. I was pretty frustrated that my neighbors were so rude...and were content to remain ignorant...and did I say, they were enraged?
Going into the meeting I wasn't sure of anything except that I couldn't sit this out. The previous two days were a flood of bully emails circulated through our community email service (that a tireless individual voluntarily maintains). It was obvious that the most vocal in the community were not at all informed.
To be fair, the community was responding in fear, in ignorance. But the problem is, they wanted to maintain a mob mentality, and under no circumstance did they want to hear anything that didn't confirm or affirm their fear.
Why did I not sit on the sideline and let the company take their public throttling and get on a plane and go back to Utah to figure out how to move forward? I am not a lawyer or a city official...I can't speak reason to a frenzied crowd...nobody can. Mind you there was nobody there who could be made happy under the current scenario of this company coming into their back yard, so why am I ok with it?
Because I know we have a need here. My friend buried her 17 year old daughter after a heroin overdose...my neighbor is a recovering alcoholic...because I would rather have an addict in treatment than Know they are driving down my street in an altered state without a place to go for help.
Moreover, because the Christ in me is tired of pretending that social justice is someone else's job. I would trade homes with the neighbors who are afraid. If I had the resource, I would buy their homes and send them off with a blessing. But I can't do that. What I could do, I did. I extended southern hospitality to the fine folks, truly lovely people from Utah. I apologized that they were treated so harshly when they had followed every rule and law in purchasing the land and getting the appropriate permits.
I shared a meal with them, my new friends...I simply did the next right thing...I stood for something...I stood for civility, for reason, for being decent. That was not the norm tonight, and that bothers me.
So, while I will not become an activist, I will be more mindful to take a stand for what matters, and to me, treating people with respect matters. Extending grace matters. Speaking truth in love matters.
Stand for what matters...the sideline has enough representation.
The individuals who came here from Utah on a moments notice to provide accurate information about what they do and don't do were met with heckling, shouting, called liars, and treated in a most uncharitable manner. I was pretty frustrated that my neighbors were so rude...and were content to remain ignorant...and did I say, they were enraged?
Going into the meeting I wasn't sure of anything except that I couldn't sit this out. The previous two days were a flood of bully emails circulated through our community email service (that a tireless individual voluntarily maintains). It was obvious that the most vocal in the community were not at all informed.
To be fair, the community was responding in fear, in ignorance. But the problem is, they wanted to maintain a mob mentality, and under no circumstance did they want to hear anything that didn't confirm or affirm their fear.
Why did I not sit on the sideline and let the company take their public throttling and get on a plane and go back to Utah to figure out how to move forward? I am not a lawyer or a city official...I can't speak reason to a frenzied crowd...nobody can. Mind you there was nobody there who could be made happy under the current scenario of this company coming into their back yard, so why am I ok with it?
Because I know we have a need here. My friend buried her 17 year old daughter after a heroin overdose...my neighbor is a recovering alcoholic...because I would rather have an addict in treatment than Know they are driving down my street in an altered state without a place to go for help.
Moreover, because the Christ in me is tired of pretending that social justice is someone else's job. I would trade homes with the neighbors who are afraid. If I had the resource, I would buy their homes and send them off with a blessing. But I can't do that. What I could do, I did. I extended southern hospitality to the fine folks, truly lovely people from Utah. I apologized that they were treated so harshly when they had followed every rule and law in purchasing the land and getting the appropriate permits.
I shared a meal with them, my new friends...I simply did the next right thing...I stood for something...I stood for civility, for reason, for being decent. That was not the norm tonight, and that bothers me.
So, while I will not become an activist, I will be more mindful to take a stand for what matters, and to me, treating people with respect matters. Extending grace matters. Speaking truth in love matters.
Stand for what matters...the sideline has enough representation.
Thursday, February 9, 2012
A Peach Among the Pairs
So...it is the month for expressive Love...romance...Valentine's Day. Egad! I have to admit, seeing that on the calendar is akin to a goblin goosing me at Halloween. The world screams reminders of how alone we are when we are not paired up with the soul mate of our dreams. And the tendancy is to perhaps feel very misplaced in a world of couples when you are single...
However, it is important to have a little perspective before sliding down into the pit of lonliness. First, I have (and I am sure you have) far too many fabulous people in my life to ever make the claim I am alone. Secondly, I wouldn't trade places with too many of my friends who are in a relationship...they are really hard work! And most importantly, I think that whether or not I am involved in a relationship with a man I love and admire has little bearing on how I should view myself any day of the year.
So, why the second guessing of being alone when Valentine's Day rolls around...why feel like a giant billboard has been erected in the universe advertising that the world is made for pairs and not individuals? Because Hallmark likes it that way...
What then shall I do? Bemoan that I will not get that special Valentine and roses and fabulous dinner OR, send out cards to the wonderful people who have blessed my life? Real tough choice...NOT.
I am reminded that I have invested deeply into the lives of people, and the return is always there. With few exceptions in a lifetime, my friends have not 'broken up' with me, or unfriended me. There are, to be honest, those who have, and for them I send a prayer and a blessing and hope that they are well.
For the rest, I send this wish, that 2012 would give us quality time together, whether laughing, watching a movie, taking a hike, traveling, or deep in conversation. I would have you know, I am grateful you are part of my life.
So rather than feel like a thorn on the rose of February, I celebrate being a Peach Among the Pairs.
Here I sit, another day..
A peach among the pairs...amd secretly hoping that it will not always be that way, but knowing I will be just fine if it is.
However, it is important to have a little perspective before sliding down into the pit of lonliness. First, I have (and I am sure you have) far too many fabulous people in my life to ever make the claim I am alone. Secondly, I wouldn't trade places with too many of my friends who are in a relationship...they are really hard work! And most importantly, I think that whether or not I am involved in a relationship with a man I love and admire has little bearing on how I should view myself any day of the year.
So, why the second guessing of being alone when Valentine's Day rolls around...why feel like a giant billboard has been erected in the universe advertising that the world is made for pairs and not individuals? Because Hallmark likes it that way...
What then shall I do? Bemoan that I will not get that special Valentine and roses and fabulous dinner OR, send out cards to the wonderful people who have blessed my life? Real tough choice...NOT.
I am reminded that I have invested deeply into the lives of people, and the return is always there. With few exceptions in a lifetime, my friends have not 'broken up' with me, or unfriended me. There are, to be honest, those who have, and for them I send a prayer and a blessing and hope that they are well.
For the rest, I send this wish, that 2012 would give us quality time together, whether laughing, watching a movie, taking a hike, traveling, or deep in conversation. I would have you know, I am grateful you are part of my life.
So rather than feel like a thorn on the rose of February, I celebrate being a Peach Among the Pairs.
Here I sit, another day..
A peach among the pairs...amd secretly hoping that it will not always be that way, but knowing I will be just fine if it is.
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Rolling With The Flow
I am at the Gulf for the weekend. Just an opportunity to reflect on a bit of a beating my body took in 2011. What is my takeaway?
Like the river that flows through the base of the canyon-cascading and falling over the rocks...onto the shore...never stopped by the barriers that rise up on all sides.
The river changes course and even gains momentum after crossing each obstacle that rises in its path. My life is like the river flowing through the low valley-veering and steering over rocks and through narrowed passages-finding a new course that will lead to the ocean of my tomorrows.
As the river empties itself into the mouth of the bay-becoming one with the ocean-so will I empty myself into something much bigger than myself.
2012 calls me to live large, hold to my faith, and leave the results to God.
Like the river that flows through the base of the canyon-cascading and falling over the rocks...onto the shore...never stopped by the barriers that rise up on all sides.
The river changes course and even gains momentum after crossing each obstacle that rises in its path. My life is like the river flowing through the low valley-veering and steering over rocks and through narrowed passages-finding a new course that will lead to the ocean of my tomorrows.
As the river empties itself into the mouth of the bay-becoming one with the ocean-so will I empty myself into something much bigger than myself.
2012 calls me to live large, hold to my faith, and leave the results to God.
Saturday, January 7, 2012
Walking through the valley
As I look out on this perfectly beautiful day, I am thinking of my friends. Remember I told you that the spot of the road I am currently on can lead me to have a little self pity. After five breast reconstruction surgeries in 2011 following a mastectomy, I thought all was over and 2012 meant no more procedures. However, the final graft is not finding its way to full life...and I want to pout. But I just can't...because I have a mere pot hole in my road, and my friends have been shoved off the road into the deep valley. My longing is to take the trek and phsically walk through that valley with my friends, and I know I will, just not today. Today I will pray for them.
I am learning that it is not always possible to do something that seems meaningful for another person, but it always possible to send a note of encouragement, pray for their comfort and know that God is the ultimate provider for them and for me.
A high school classmate (a funny, strong and wonderful woman) is recovering from a heart/ double lung transplant. I hear that she is mouthing the words thank you to nurses who are no doubt doing their best, but cannot touch her discomfort...and I should focus on a dying graft...I don't think so now.
Olivia, one of my two precious great nieces is recovering from a bone marrow transplant and dancing in the hospital for all to see...and I am reminded of the joy that God alone can bring.
And then there is my friend, Catherine, for whom I have made far too little time this year as she walks back into life after receiving a kidney transplant. I am sure the recovery process and medications required make for a significant challenge. A long road.
My friend of 38 plus years is watching both parents struggle through what appears to be the close to their journey on earth. It means for her weekly trips to another state to be the nurturer to them that they were to her growing up...and though she doesn't want them to suffer, it will hurt like hell to have them removed from her physical presence. Makes me want to go and assist...cook meals, do laundry, sit and comfort...but I sm several states away trying to avoid wallering in self pity. So I will pray, and make that call, and send that card. God will do the rest.
In 2012, I challenge myself to demonstrate caring in a tangible way. I will buy postage stamps and cards and send notes when I have no idea what to say. I will leave the message on the answering machine saying, "I care," and I will pray fervently.
How can you walk through the valley, and hold someone's hand?
I am learning that it is not always possible to do something that seems meaningful for another person, but it always possible to send a note of encouragement, pray for their comfort and know that God is the ultimate provider for them and for me.
A high school classmate (a funny, strong and wonderful woman) is recovering from a heart/ double lung transplant. I hear that she is mouthing the words thank you to nurses who are no doubt doing their best, but cannot touch her discomfort...and I should focus on a dying graft...I don't think so now.
Olivia, one of my two precious great nieces is recovering from a bone marrow transplant and dancing in the hospital for all to see...and I am reminded of the joy that God alone can bring.
And then there is my friend, Catherine, for whom I have made far too little time this year as she walks back into life after receiving a kidney transplant. I am sure the recovery process and medications required make for a significant challenge. A long road.
My friend of 38 plus years is watching both parents struggle through what appears to be the close to their journey on earth. It means for her weekly trips to another state to be the nurturer to them that they were to her growing up...and though she doesn't want them to suffer, it will hurt like hell to have them removed from her physical presence. Makes me want to go and assist...cook meals, do laundry, sit and comfort...but I sm several states away trying to avoid wallering in self pity. So I will pray, and make that call, and send that card. God will do the rest.
In 2012, I challenge myself to demonstrate caring in a tangible way. I will buy postage stamps and cards and send notes when I have no idea what to say. I will leave the message on the answering machine saying, "I care," and I will pray fervently.
How can you walk through the valley, and hold someone's hand?
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
A New Start
It would be no exaggeration to say, I am grateful 2011 is over. The highs spots seem to be too few and the low points seem as though there are too many to count...so, I want to review the high points! Since this is my first blog entry, this will be a summary of my year, but I promise future entries will be topic specific...
I had the opportunity to find out that when unable to get out of the house for days on end ( I had five surgeries in 2011,) self pity likes to take over my otherwise sassy self. Self pity is UGLY, and serves no purpose after about five minutes, and I am not good at maintaining a victim status. So my first high point is 2011 taught me gratitude for the provision of fantastic medical care and the resilience of the human body. I let myself rest to heal, and used the downtime to open my door to friends and family. In particular, my mom has been a cheerleader, an encourager, a sympathetic ear, and one heck of a maid! My friends have been soothing, entertaining, and full of surprises. If you come over to my home, you are going to be welcomed into rooms with window coverings that will stun you...because Jan and Maripat decided that my surroundings should comfort me in my year of recovery. They apparently emailed my friends, took up a collection that in no way covered the true cost, and my bedroom and living room drapes are a daily reminder that I am loved by friends and strangers and covered in kindness.
I began the year sending my lovely and high maintenance Bassett hound to stay on a farm with Jennifer since I could not provide adequate care for her for health reasons...and ended the year with two adopted cats who are my constant entertainment and bed buds. When Maggie (my dog) comes for visits, the cats, Flick and Mo realize they are not the only animals on the planet, and that too is entertaining. I learn from watching their territorial dance to be welcoming to people who, by their appearance, make me want to shy away before giving them a chance to grow on me.
My great niece, Olivia, was diagnosed with leukemia in July, an aggressive version I cannot spell...and received a bone marrow transplant in December from a 21 year old stranger from the bone marrow registry...wow...the gifts of strangers amaze me. Olivia is doing well, but the road is long and full of pain. She is an amazing trooper, and she has wonderful parents and grandparents who provide everything possible. Olivia teaches me by example to make hay while the sun shines. The high spot here is obviously that sweet Olivia is showing great signs of healing, and that often our provisions have nothing to do with our personal limited resources.
And then there is God....sometimes in 2011 I really questioned what sort of plan He had playing out in my life, but never questioned that He did have a plan. I have no sound answer to what the plan is, but I walk into 2012 planning to live large...shower my friends and family...and strangers...with love...say I am sorry quickly if I have committed an offense...and say I forgive you if you offend me, whether you ask forgiveness or not.
And I commit to writing about things that matter, or if they don't matter, make you laugh!
Come along side for the journey, I think it will be a great year.
I had the opportunity to find out that when unable to get out of the house for days on end ( I had five surgeries in 2011,) self pity likes to take over my otherwise sassy self. Self pity is UGLY, and serves no purpose after about five minutes, and I am not good at maintaining a victim status. So my first high point is 2011 taught me gratitude for the provision of fantastic medical care and the resilience of the human body. I let myself rest to heal, and used the downtime to open my door to friends and family. In particular, my mom has been a cheerleader, an encourager, a sympathetic ear, and one heck of a maid! My friends have been soothing, entertaining, and full of surprises. If you come over to my home, you are going to be welcomed into rooms with window coverings that will stun you...because Jan and Maripat decided that my surroundings should comfort me in my year of recovery. They apparently emailed my friends, took up a collection that in no way covered the true cost, and my bedroom and living room drapes are a daily reminder that I am loved by friends and strangers and covered in kindness.
I began the year sending my lovely and high maintenance Bassett hound to stay on a farm with Jennifer since I could not provide adequate care for her for health reasons...and ended the year with two adopted cats who are my constant entertainment and bed buds. When Maggie (my dog) comes for visits, the cats, Flick and Mo realize they are not the only animals on the planet, and that too is entertaining. I learn from watching their territorial dance to be welcoming to people who, by their appearance, make me want to shy away before giving them a chance to grow on me.
My great niece, Olivia, was diagnosed with leukemia in July, an aggressive version I cannot spell...and received a bone marrow transplant in December from a 21 year old stranger from the bone marrow registry...wow...the gifts of strangers amaze me. Olivia is doing well, but the road is long and full of pain. She is an amazing trooper, and she has wonderful parents and grandparents who provide everything possible. Olivia teaches me by example to make hay while the sun shines. The high spot here is obviously that sweet Olivia is showing great signs of healing, and that often our provisions have nothing to do with our personal limited resources.
And then there is God....sometimes in 2011 I really questioned what sort of plan He had playing out in my life, but never questioned that He did have a plan. I have no sound answer to what the plan is, but I walk into 2012 planning to live large...shower my friends and family...and strangers...with love...say I am sorry quickly if I have committed an offense...and say I forgive you if you offend me, whether you ask forgiveness or not.
And I commit to writing about things that matter, or if they don't matter, make you laugh!
Come along side for the journey, I think it will be a great year.
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